We are starting the New Year by reintroducing the purpose of our Covenant Couples blog. Our blog aims to provide a personal perspective of couples in a relationship viewed through the eyes of Vassel and Judy Lewis, who have been married for forty-seven years.

Judy and Vassel’s relationship is built on the belief that Marriage is a covenant created by God. Therefore, it is divinely designed. Of course, we don’t expect everyone who reads our blog to agree with us; however, we hope that what we share will be of some benefit and an invitation for other couples to share some thoughts and experiences with us.

Out of curiosity, I often ask people, “How old should a person be before they get married?”The response to this question varies from person to person.

My wife and I were very young when we married, and modern viewpoints often speak against marrying young. We will address the age conversation in future blogs.

Marriage is a covenant and is a reflection of the relationship between Christ and the Church, and Marriage on earth also reflects Christ’s love for the church. Therefore, God hates divorce because our relationship should simulate Christ’s Marriage with the church, which is forever!

People have asked what’s the key to a long-lasting marriage.

So we like our reading audience to share what they think are the keys to a successful marriage relationship and how old a couple should be when married.

In conclusion, the covenant is God’s mechanism to administrate His Kingdom agenda.

Crack- To open slightly; breakthrough something such as a barrier to gain acceptance or recognition.

I suppose this might seem like a bizarre title for a marriage blog. My intentions are always to grab your attention. Let me start with a side thought on this Valentine’s Day. I’m thinking about broken hearts.

Yes, yes, yes, let’s acknowledge the authentic dog trainers, women. Women who purposefully set their eyes upon married men train men in relationships to think that as females, we don’t respect one another; the sisterhood. Does not the Word of God speak about lust? Ephesians 5:3-4 in the Msg translation says, “Don’t allow love to turn into lust, setting off a downhill slide into sexual promiscuity, filthy practices or bullying greed.”

Now let’s talk about Crack, that deadly substance of the mind, that is. It may disguise itself as curiosity, courtesy, or even politeness. 

Have you ever been in these types of situations: 1. The co-worker you see every day, have lunch with, take breaks with, share little stories of personal life with…hmmm? 2) High school friend, rode the bus together, in the same class/club, shared meals, laughed, and played…hmmm? 3) Neighbor you shared coffee with, borrowed sugar from, went to sporting games, had Bar B-Q’s, argued and made up, sat on the front/back porch shooting the breeze…hmmm? 4) Church member, prayed with, prayed for, shared struggles, sang together, shouted together, went on group trips, shared hotel rooms…hmmm? 5) Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend, need I say more?

Did you notice that you have shared intimate things about your life with people you have become comfortable with, and they, in turn, became comfortable with you in your lifetime? However, you have your life partner and are committed to them. You have declared to God and the world they are my forever love. Aha! But guess who else heard that proclamation? The enemy heard it and is out to destroy what God has joined together. How will he do it, you ask? The enemy will begin to put lust, desire, and curiosity into those unsuspecting acquaintances in your life. He might even add in a relative…Whaat!

One day you will receive a call on the phone, a dm on one of the socials, or even a knock at the door, CRACK. You’ll answer and be surprised but cordial. You’ll exclaim how good it is to hear from them, and they’ll say, Hey, let’s meet up…CRACK, Does not the scripture say watch as well as pray, Matthew 26:41. Why don’t you bring your spouse along to not formulate a crack for the meet-up? I know that you do not think that something might happen, but an unguarded mind will unintentionally allow cracks to occur. Do you recall the definition, as mentioned earlier, of a crack? It will enable something to come through a barrier to gain acceptance or recognition. Once the Crack occurs, it turns into a fissure and starts splintering off into different directions, and before you can say stop, it has already begun. Now you find yourself having feelings for someone who only really wanted to see if you were really committed to your relationship. Now they are gone, and your spouse is too. You failed to see the cracks. Corrosive Random Alternative Chasms Kill (CRACK)

The Covenant Couples blog aims to provide a personal perspective of couples in a relationship. The Covenant Couple views are seen through the eyes of Vassel and Judy Lewis, who have been married forty-six years. Their relationship is built on the belief in God and those experiences that impacted their lives over many years. We don’t expect that everyone who reads our blog will agree with us; however, we hope that what we share will be of some benefit and an invitation for other couples to share some thoughts and experiences with us.

  My wife and I were very young when we married, and modern viewpoints often speak against marrying young. Looking back in hindsight, I can say now this was probably one of the best decisions we ever made. Out of curiosity, I often ask people, “How old should a person be before they get married?” It is incredible the answers I get. My wife and I dated one year before marriage. Over the years, Judy and I have been asked, “What are the keys to having a lasting relationship?” We will explore this question and others and want you to join us.

                                                          The Uninvited Guest

As I think on Covenant Couples, who have decided and know that in the marriage there is God, God the Father, God the Almighty, the original matchmaker the man and woman know that they have made a covenant not just with each other but also with God. Isn’t it beautiful? Yes, but there is always a dark side lurking and looking to destroy what God has put together.

Now let us picture the wedding ceremony. We have invited family and friends. Some have special witnesses called bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girls, ring bearers, maid/matron of honor, best man, and of course, the officiant. We all have gathered to witness the joining together of the man and woman. What God has joined together, let no man break asunder. There is so much joy amongst the witnesses. The couple is standing at the altar smiling; however, they are not alone. Dear readers, you do know that we are not just physical beings but spiritual also. God has placed his spiritual beings around us called guardian angels. (Heb.1:14) (Psalm 34:7) (Psalm 91:11) Yes, imagine the bride with her guardian angel and the groom with his. OH, wait now, we have some uninvited guests!

Satan is not omnipresent; he cannot be everywhere, so he has imps and puts those imps on the people who make covenants with the almighty God. Remember Satan’s job on the earth is to kill, steal and destroy. (Jn10:10) When you stood at the altar, spiritual warfare was now going to begin to assault your marriage and future family. Marriage is a permanent relationship, and Satan seeks to destroy it because it reflects Jesus and the church. He began with the subtle serpent in the garden messing with the first bride and groom. He whispers half-truths and causes you to entertain it and not investigate it.

Oh my, let me stop; I feel a teaching sermon coming on. Nevertheless, my beloveds, let’s be aware, let’s be vigilant, and let’s be intentional concerning our covenant. Protect it. Do not open your spiritual portals to those forces that would seek to destroy the very thing that God has ordained. Remember, do not entertain suggestions of failure in your marriage. God was there in the beginning; allow Him to remain throughout the entirety of your marriage.

“Test and trials come to make you strong, keep on believing, you keep holding on and get ready for your blessing.” (Norman Hutchinson) Your blessings of 5,10,15,25,40,50 years and long as you are together till death do you part. Remember, Watch out for Uninvited Guest.

Uninvited Guest: someone who has the appearance of a guest. They blend in and are there to observe. Some may be harmful and bare ill-will.

Common sense as a noun means good sense and sound judgment in practical matters also relating to a community at large it means working for the common good.

Our culture and society have had a negative view of marriage for a long time.  Unfortunately, this causes us to miss out on all of our God-given benefits built into the DNA of the relationship.

Becoming one in marriage protects you from the hardships of multiple relationships many without sound purpose. It gives you the ability to create what we call today a “real ride or die, “partner” someone who has your back through thick and thin. It is the foundation of building a nation of offspring that has the potential of having a profound impact on the world and make major contributions to society. Marriage improves the economic viability of the family and protection from being alone.

Most importantly the innate power of two declared by God himself in Matthew 18:20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there among them. Matthew 18:19 Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.

I think marriage makes sense!

    The climax of the creation account told in Genesis 1 is the creation of Adam and Eve.  God is the creator and we bear His image the intrinsic dignity and value is because of the image they reflect which is God.

If we don’t see each other as image bearers of God to me it makes it very difficult to value life in the same manner that God does.  I really dislike when my wife and I have any type of disagreement. I always feel as if my insides are tearing and it becomes almost unbearable. I come to realize that at the point of impaired hearing I need to tactfully retreat and go into my quiet place and gain insight from my Heavenly Father especially when the disagreement involves a personal critique about you.

Wrong attitude! I come to learn that it’s not about you it is about the collective body of one. A key part of God’s image for married couples is the becoming of one. So getting to myself and the one who knows all about me (God) provides a platform to hear what truly has been said within the discourse of the disagreement.

I Peter 3:7 talks about your prayers not being hindered. The” let us” in Genesis 1:26 is reflective of how being united can and will accomplish great things in a marriage relationship when two touches and agree on everything.  Matthew 18:19, ” That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven”.  God through His son Jesus has given married couples an innate power of one that will allow them to overcome anything.

In the language of the OT, the future is behind you and the past is in front of you. The Hebrew word for “in front of” (qedem) is the same word for “past.” And the word for “behind” (achar) is the basis for the word for “future” (achareet). Thus, if you were to ask Abraham, Isaac, or Jacob where the future was, they’d point behind them. Likewise, ask them where the past is, and they’d point in front of them.The reason for this is as simple as it is insightful: we have seen the past, but we have not seen the future. We know what has happened. It is done, finished, and laid bare before our eyes. Thus the past is in front of us, where our eyes can see it. On the other hand, we don’t know what the future holds. We cannot see it, thus it is hidden from our eyes or behind us. Therefore, in the Hebrew conception of time, one might say that we are always walking backward into the future.

Using this Hebrew cultural future concept to share “Loving through hardship” really help me to see how much God really loves us. All people in this life will sometimes have a period of suffering or privation. So viewing the future as that it is already here gives you an empirical look of your life. When things are going well-loving someone is much easier. However, when seemingly difficult hardships come such as loss of job, sickness, and disease, dying of a loved one, imprisonment of a child, What will help you through these devastating situations?

The only thing that I have found via looking at my future that can sustain you is “God’s love”. If you have ever been through a devastating situation you know no words from any human being can be said to help you. Only God can pierce through the pain of hardship and give you peace. The peace that God gives offers you the ability to comfort the one you love that is going through with you. To be able to pull them into that place of peace that can comfort you both and will push you into the image of being joined together as one that  God intended for all married couples to be.

These are the type of hardships that have torn married relationships apart and I just want to testify to my readers that these hardships the aforementioned ones that we have experience and much more has assisted in pushing us closer towards the destiny to becoming one that God wants us to be and we are yet being pushed.

Truth is, no relationship comes with a lifetime guarantee. However, as Christians, we have help in improving the success of the relationship by applying the word of God.  From the very beginning of my wife and I relationship, I always felt that our marriage wasn’t about us per se but more about Him. I was sharing with someone the other day and I shared with them the real driving factor about why I wanted to get married.

Although I thought I loved the woman that I was about to married I realized if I was going, to be honest I did not truly know what love was at that time but, my love for God and doing right in His eyes led me to do the right thing for both my future wife and myself. This is what I mean when I say “Bring the entire relationship under the word of God”, that everything you do in a relationship should be driven by the fact that it should please God. “One Marriage Under God With Liberty”. Free to love like God, Free to give to each other like God, Free to walk together like God intended for you to walk. “Can two walk together, except they be agreed? Sometimes you will disagree to get to an agreement and this process should be done in such a way that also pleases God.

You may ask the questions! Why should I bring my relationship under the Word of God? Because within the obedience of doing so are great benefits specific to marriage. If you understand what a covenant is you should understand that marriage mirrors God’s covenant with His people which should prove to you how important marriage is to God.

I believe marriage is one of those secret mysteries hidden in Christ. To hear the secrets of God you have to come close to Him and enter into His secret place. To really know your wife or your husband you have to have an opportunity to enter into those intimate places to see and hear all of the mysteries and secrets that has affected their life both good and bad.

God uses the marriage institution as the foundation of teaching us to love the people around us, our communities, our friends, our neighbors, more importantly, how to love Him. To know your spouse God gives us early in our relationship with Him a revelation concerning the relationship He has with His Son. There is a union with God, a fellowship of three, such as is with our marriage relationship, it is husband, wife and God. God’s union is love and for us to reflect His union we have to love ourselves, our spouse, and God as one, mystery! To reflect a oneness that is so intertwined that nothing can separate it.

The institution of marriage reflects the commitment God has with His people. His covenant with us is mirrored in the marriage relationship. God has made commitments to His People, we have made commitments to our spouses, God promises to never leave us or forsake us. We must have this same commitment with one another.  Our blessings lie within being obedient to His covenant. We are to honor each other before God the way we were instructed to by His desire for us to become one, the true sweet secret mystery.